Home is a powerful word.
Okay, lemme try that again because that sounds stupid.
Home is a powerful idea. It's the embodiment of security, warmth and cat debris. It is the place where you go when you've got nowhere else to turn. It's that little house button on your browser.
It's also, if you're lucky, the place where you put your computer. I'm not on my computer. Which is a good indication that I'm not home. And to keep the suspense from killing some of our more sensitive readers, I'mma admit right away that I'm using The Girlfriend's computer. I've squirrelled myself away in her basement and commandeered her computer.
There is a collection of interesting things here on the desk. A piece of yella paper here that has a list of things on it in tiny handwriting, for example. Number 4 says "indulgences" while another says "printing press". This is evidently some kind of world-domination checklist. Makes me nervous.
There's a pair of glasses that give me an instant headache. A receipt for something called a "MoneyGram," which I take to be some kind of delicious legal cracker.
To close this post, I've come up with a really stupid way of saying that somebody in your vicinity isn't meeting the full intelligence expectations: "(name of person)'s been eating too many frogs!"
I know, I know. I blame the coffee.
9 comments:
Dude, you're funny. I'm gonna bookmark this here blog so that I can read it regularly.
I try to be humorous in my blog as well. The blogosphere is so bereft of humor it's mind-boggling. Just endless prattling about insipid things in people's lives. Help!
World-domination checklist. I like that idea. I can see Hitler musing in his study, surrounding by piles of Post-It notes.
"Hmmm, let's see. Massive army, silly mustache, death camps...yup! I think I'm ready!"
That's it! You brought up the H word, my friend. You crossed the line. This is no joking matter.
I have no choice but to ... immediately link to your blog from mine.
P.S. Al Gore invented Post-It notes
I think Al Gore also invented Al Gore. Many times.
Spiff! Thanks, Dan. I too have been troubled by the fact that a good 80% of bloggers have evidently spilled mustard all over their keyboards, disabling a great many of the punctuation keys.
so yeh thax four stoping bye!
Watch your step around The Girlfriend, Pick Wheeze. If she is truly after world domination, you can be sure you'll be the first one put up against the wall and shot when the revolution comes.
"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy defines the marketing division of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation as 'a bunch of mindless jerks who'll be the first against the wall when the revolution comes.'"
That book, perhaps? It's a good old book.
Yeah, that's the one. Personally, I think that line is the best one in all literature and I have used it at every possible occasion. It's one of the few quotes that becomes funnier with each successive telling. I have Peeze Whik to thank for turning me on to "The Guide."
No Jules Verne?
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